But I won't. I can't. Last night I was itching to go out. Great weather, calf is healed, everything aligned. So I started thinking, nay, trying to talk myself into throwing my running shoes on and taking them for a spin. I've had to battle this demon a lot this past week.
I mean, there is so much the taper causes that goes against the grain.
- It doesn't allow me to run when I want. I feel I can run a ton, but I know I can't, and that is frustrating. Not only because of the taper but because I want to be sure my calf is fully healed.
- The weather is perfect for running. I step outside and feel the air, breathe it in, look at the falling leaves and think to myself, "What great weather to run in" only to turn around and walk back into the house.
- Finally, I feel like I gain weight during this week. That I eat more and become more lazy because I can't go outside and run. It is so strange to feel so healthy during a run, in fact during the run I will do this weekend, and yet the weekend before I feel unhealthy because I can't run. Strange.
Ultimately I know what I must do in order to better my chances at running the marathon that I want.
It doesn't mean I have to like it.
(and I won't like it when I can't run the week after because of sore joints and muscles, so I will have to go through all this again)